Thursday, June 04, 2009

The devil made them do it.

So today I'm on the phone with Verizon, trying to straighten out a billing issue. Like many major companies nowadays, Verizon tries to handle all of your problems via automated voice prompts, which, of course, have been carefully designed to never cover the topic(s) you want to discuss. Verizon also incorporates elements of voice recognition, but they don't seem active at all times, thus you never known when they're going to kick in. Anyway, I'm trying to get to the office that handles my specific questionfor some reason that I fail to grasp, the billing people don't have access to the same screens as the payment people, and vice versaand I keep getting shunted back into the automated system, where I'm dealing with an ever-expanding menu of unhelpful options, such that my frustration is growing in proportion to that expanding menu. Finally I get so aggravated that I mutter, mostly to myself but quite aloud, "Jesus Christ!"

And the next thing I hear is: "Jesus not available. If you'd like another extension, please say the name, or type the corresponding letters...."


Noadi said...

That's hilarious!

I've had similar situations happen when trying to work out issues with student loans. They also don't seem to have payment and billing on the same screen or possibly the same planet.

Chad Hogg said...

You have probably already seen this, but in case you have not, you should listen to this recording of a telephone conversation between a customer and some very confused Verizon representatives. It is long, but worth the listen.

roger o'keefe said...

That's pretty funny stuff, Steve. You're right though, those automated response phone systems drive me crazy.

Elizabeth said...


But what do they mean, JC not available...? Shame on Verizon, is all I say.

Yekaterina said...

Thank you for the laugh!!